Me Outside: Ew gross people get the fuck away from me fuck off.
Me Inside: No you don’t understand I just want to touch something. Some skin is all. Just a brush against my fingertips is fine. Please…someone please touch me.
very very very below average
All my checks will…
bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce.
Seagrams poppin’ in our refrigerator, $5 for 4 bottles and I save ‘em for later. I got: ramen on the left [left], pizza on the right [right], and a free month on netflix so we stay turnt up all night.
masculinity is so funny to me bc men deprive themselves of the best things in life in order to achieve it like ….fuzzy socks, fun fruity pink drinks, spa days, lifetime movies, expressing positive feelings in a healthy way, being a warm genuine person
We “adopted” this kitten from the storm drain last night. He was in danger and was crying his poor eyes out
I LOOKED UP CACTUS PUNS
THIS IS INCREDIBLE.
Are these drake lyrics
ladies and gentlemen, the most accurate post on tumblr
I reblog this every single time
listen, i don’t know about you, but the only people I know who actually enjoy the smell of axe body spray are not women. it’s dudes. it’s all dudes. i have worn axe body spray and walked into a room and have been complimented by legions of dudes. axe body spray is an agent of the gay agenda to make men smell better for other men to unlock their latent homosexuality and there is no stopping them now, we’re in too deep and it’s far too late.
I want to dig my nails in your back as you kiss my neck
reasons to be a mermaid
- no periods
- no pants
u forgot these:
- perfect hair
- free clam bra
- u get to lure man
#*to their death
omfg why are you doing this to me
who gave u the right
no matter how many times this gos on my dash i shall always reblog.
there are tears